Monsters

Monsters crawl beneath my bed

They hide in my cupboard

They live in my head

 

Hideous creatures who slithers about

In the dark hidden corners

Of perpetual doubt

 

Out of rational reach

They hiss horrible things

And I try to remember

That none of it’s true

That this is not me

These thoughts are not mine

 

But as I look in the mirror

It silently screams

This is you!

This is you!

This is you…

 

In the shadows of sorrow

A creeping thing crawls

Quietly nesting behind

The paper thin walls

Of my mind

 

I wish I could catch it

Before it melts in my brain

But I wonder, what if…

I’m already insane?

I am invisible

I know you can’t see me

although I don’t know why

I know you can’t hear me

no matter how hard I cry

 

I weep in the night but

I get up each day

I wonder what more

what else I should pray

 

I don’t understand it

I scream so loud

How can you not hear me

or see me,

what makes you so god-damn proud?

 

I go to the mirror

to rant and to rage

but there’s nothing to see

my image is gone

I can’t see … me

 

I open my mouth

to scream in despair

But I can’t hear a thing

The voice I thought was in me

is nothing but air

 

There’s nothing to see

There’s nothing to hear

turns out, I have nothing to offer

… why am I here?

Sorrow

Sorrow is grey, oh was

it but black or white!

The taste thereof is lukewarm 

coffee

and it smells like a rubbish dump

burning

It looks like a mother mourning for her

son

the sound thereof: her cry!

Go and feel an orphan's hands

and you'll feel

sorrow

Written by: Marista 

Date: 1995
Copyright reserved

Looking Back

Today is gonna be the day that
you'll search your heart
and you'll search your soul
but you won't find me there
for tomorrow I'll be gone

I'm a superstitious girl
but I talked to God in a phonebox
He said that life is life -
this is what you get

I wish you were here
so you could take me to the place where you go
a better place to play
but all the lights that lead us there are blinding
we'll search no more

How do I live with or without you?
I gave up forever
They said we'll never make it
yet those days were the best days of my life

I don't know where we went wrong
maybe we've gone too far
I got more than I could handle
and it's all your fault
but what goes around never comes around to you

I can't forget the things you never said
It ain't easy to say goodbye
but all I really want is deliverance
and nothing else matters.

Written by: Marista
Date: Unknown
Copyright reserved

Info: this poem is made up with single lines from the lyrics of various songs by various artists

I loved you

I wish you would come
to whisper my pain away
and to kiss peace in its place

I wish you would stay
to keep watch over me
and be my handsome bodyguard

I wish you would leave
so I can find myself
just to lose it in you again

I wish you would die
so I could be the door to your heart
for all eternity

I wish you would live
so you can share my life
and I yours

I wish you would wait
for me
for my body to heal
my heart to ripen
and my mind to clear
so everything would be perfect

I wish you would love... me.

Written by:   Marista Grobler
Date: 1999
Copyright reserved